Coping with Stress & Burnout: What Actually Helps
Burnout is more than being tired, or even exhausted. It’s that hollow feeling when even the things you care about feel out of reach. It might feel like this super imposed film photo — where too many exposures blur together until the details are lost and the original image becomes hard to see.
I notice that this can sound and look a lot like depression, but there’s a difference. Burnout usually shows up in connection to work or caregiving roles and often improves with rest, boundaries, and support. Depression, on the other hand, is more pervasive and affects all areas of life, no matter how much time off you take. Sometimes the two overlap, which is why it helps to pay attention to what your body and mind are telling you and reach out for professional support if things feel too heavy.
And while there are plenty of “quick fixes” out there, real recovery often comes from going deeper by going into the body, into our inner world, but most importantly, into connection with others.
Start with the Nervous System
Polyvagal Theory reminds us that stress is not just in our heads, it’s in our bodies. When we’re burned out, our nervous system can get stuck in survival mode by getting revved up and anxious, or shut down and numb. Simple grounding practices can help. Try slowing your breath, noticing your feet on the floor, or even taking a short walk outside. These cues let your body know you’re safe enough to rest.
Why Mindfulness Isn’t Always Enough
Mindfulness can help, but it’s not a cure-all. For some of us, sitting quietly with our thoughts actually makes things worse. What often works better is combining mindfulness with movement, nature, or creative expression… something that gently brings you back into your body and out of the pressure to “get it right.”
Listening to Your Inner Parts
Internal Family Systems (IFS) adds another layer. Burnout often shows up as an inner tug-of-war: one part of you is pushing to keep going, another part is caretaking everyone else, and yet another just wants to collapse on the couch. Instead of fighting these parts, IFS teaches us to get curious about them. What or who are they protecting? What do they need? When we listen with compassion, these parts soften, and the pressure inside eases.
We Heal in Connection
Burnout loooves isolation, but recovery happens in relationship. Our nervous systems calm when we feel supported. That might be a trusted friend, a peer group, a therapist, or even a workplace culture that values psychological safety. Community helps remind us we don’t have to carry it all alone.
Practical Tools That Make a Difference
Boundaries: Say no when you can. Protect time that prioritizes your needs.
Rest: Real rest means more than sleep. Take small pauses, give yourself downtime.
Movement: Walk, stretch, or dance in your kitchen. Movement resets your system.
Connection: Reach out. Even a short chat with someone safe can be regulating.
Burnout isn’t just a scheduling problem — it’s a nervous system and inner-parts problem. Healing starts with small shifts: a breath, a boundary, a bit of support. Over time, those small steps can bring you back to feeling like yourself again.